Untitled Powerpoint Fanfic (Relevant Song Not Found)
Author's Note: ...you try thinking of a relevant Escape the Fate (but only from This War Is Ours or before) or Falling In Reverse song/lyric that works for a fanfic about Powerpoint that's about 50% author tract on infodumping as an expression of love.
"Yes, Arlo, we absolutely agree that Ronnie's output is superior, and conversely, that nothing after This War Is Ours is worthwhile." Sierra barely suppressed an eye roll, if by "barely suppressed" you mean "unabashedly engaged in".
"We're glad that you feel safe regaling us with all of your...interesting knowledge. It's important for you to have outlets for these things. Just maybe --"
Usurping any attempt on Cliff's part to let his fellow leader off gently, Sierra interrupted him. "--we neither need nor want to be your outlet over all of your waking hours that aren't spent with Spark? In reference to bands that we have no plans of ever listening to and/or esoteric research topics?"
"Research is literally my job. You are my coworkers. I can sort of get your problem with the bands, but, like, what's wrong with talking about work with my coworkers?"
"The fact that you get into enough technobabble that no one except you has any idea what's going on. Also, Giovanni doesn't care how Shadow Pokemon are made as long as they function to wreak havoc. Laws and sausages and all that. And if you start snickering because I said 'sausages', I swear on every unholy thing --"
"Now, Sierra, we don't want him to feel like he can't talk to us. We do enjoy our little chats; it's nice to see you being excited about something you're passionate about. We just feel that you need an environment where the exchange can be more...mutual. Have you considered joining Internet forums?"
"No. There are other people on said forums and they are wrong."
"Well, isn't the point of discourse to engage with viewpoints other than your own? Otherwise, you're just standing in an echo chamber or ranting to a captive audience."
"Yes, but I've analyzed every word of every song. I've done statistical analysis on lyrical and musical themes and can detect a legitimate drop in variety after Ronnie's departure. My opinions are backed up by data, but when I've tried presenting them on forums, even with the original formulae, I get ignored and accused of only saying what I do because of personal attachments, which is not the case."
"You named one of your ace Pokemon after this man and also base most of your public persona on his output and the whole idea of 'you kicked me out, so I'm going to be as much of an asshole as possible'. I'm not convinced that it's not the case."
"Sierra, he knows more about his thoughts than you do. If he says that he doesn't just like them because Ronnie is kinda hot --"
"-- I never said anything of the sort."
"-- then we should believe him. Anyway, this is a conundrum. I understand why having people ignore your peer-reviewed and statistically analyzed opinions could be annoying, but you clearly need someone who knows what you're talking about in order to thrive as the precious little emo boy you are."
Cliff reached down and ruffled Arlo's hair to emphasize his description of the other leader, to which the latter responded with very little outward reaction. At least he was an unambiguously male precious little bean. Sierra rolled her eyes once more, but rather than a snarky comment, produced the rare phenomenon of something that was actually constructive in context.
"Cliff, maybe it's not so much about someone being familiar with what he's talking about, but about how he's saying it. He likes telling this kind of thing to Spark even though they're about as far from edgelordy as you can get and likewise, he likes hearing Spark infodump even when it's about things he has no interest in himself. I don't think he wants to share opinions about his bands so much as he wants to be in an environment where everyone else is as much of an overanalytical science-freak as he is."
Both of the other leaders stood speechless for a bit at this. They'd been under the impression that Sierra didn't regard much of anyone other than herself as worthy of consideration as an independent agent, so the assessment of Arlo's motivations showed a degree of theory of mind they'd assumed she either didn't possess or solely used for evil.
"If you're thinking that I'm doing this because I care about the little douchebag, don't. I just want him to take his reverse mode ramblings somewhere else."
"You do realize that it's impolite to address someone as 'the little douchebag' while they're present, right?"
"I know. Anyway, you need to go find someone to infodump at who's not us, because no matter how much Cliff finds it adorable to see you happy and passionate, I, for one, am sick of your explanations of why one flavor of guys who need showers whining and/or screaming about their exes is better than another."
"Is that --"
"-- an order? Yes. Why don't you talk to the team leaders' nerd?"
"...you mean Blanche, right?"
"Whatever."
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Hey 🖤 |
Hey, dude! What's up? | |
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Do you know of any Team Mystic events coming up soon? |
If you're planning to rob them, I can't legally answer that. | |
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No, not that. It's that Sierra's sick of me infodumping and she thinks that maybe the Mystics might have some sort of outlet for that. Where they can all get together and each of them gets a time slot to uninterruptedly discuss whatever they want. |
well, that's rather impolite of her, rejecting a fundamental way you communicate and express love. Candela and I both know damn well that you only go into reverse mode when ur actually really comfortable with someone and want em to understand u | |
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Yeah, I know, but seriously, do the Mystics have an infodump forum, and is that accessible to non-Mystics?
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It doesn't need to be official. If I could just rent Blanche for an hour a week, that'd be fine.
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you do realize what that sounds like, right? | |
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yeah, I just processed it.
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i'll check the mystic website | |
Spark 💛✨ sent a photo | |
like, this? apparently they're doing "slideshow nights" to focus on the goal of improving the mystics' public speaking skills in the new year | |
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...pokemon trainers do public speaking?
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i don't know of any, but it's blanche what did you expect | |
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XD
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yeah. so, i just make a 5-10 minute presentation, come over to mystic hq, and have at it?
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sounds like it. | |
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do they have snacks?
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yeah, but it's blanche so it's probably just going to be fruit and stuff | |
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eh, it might be worthwhile nonetheless. also, you're coming with me. i need moral support and also i don't have a mystic hq keycard. next time i see one at a pokestop i should probs pickpocket them
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i'm going to assume you meant that statement as a joke and not alert blanche | |
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yeah as far as you know >:D
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i love how you use emojis like you don't have unicode support | |
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and i love that you recognize that as a trait i'm proud of
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🖤
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i have unicode support; i just only use it when it's earned. i'm gonna go make some slides, chat soon, ya dork
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Arlo understood the gravity of his profession. After all, he was aiding in Team Rocket conquering the world and exploiting the populace to spread misery in the name of nothing other than more conquest and soulless profits. So he didn't get why people considered his job shameful. After all, it wasn't any different from working for any other large company save that at least Team Rocket admitted it. Despite all of the seminars and official emails detailing how Team Rocket was no place for mindless edgelording and defiance and those who worked for them needed to understand Giovanni's grander plans, a major factor in Arlo's staying, shortly behind the stellar healthcare plan and them providing room and board, was the aesthetic of working as a "bad guy" and the opportunity to imbue everything he did with evil panache. This was why he'd set up a projector against the wall of his modest quarters, only one of the massive tangle of wires that ran across the walls and floors, solely so that whatever displayed on his computer screen appeared over his body like the evil hackers in movies. Of course, one would hardly consider a Powerpoint to be evil hacker material, even if the version of Office had been pirated and he used a menacing font.
Once the slides were completed, Arlo looked over them in slideshow view with satisfaction. There was always something viscerally pleasurable about producing a completed and organized document, but something about the glitz and glamour of a slideshow made that effect even stronger than either digital art or a proposal or spreadsheet would alone. The only things remaining were to copy the slides to a USB thumb drive to prepare them for the Team Mystic HQ computers. External cloud sharing platforms were prohibited while on the Team Rocket intranet, and even though Arlo could have easily circumvented that with a VPN, and occasionally did in order to download music or videos, he hadn't set up an account on any of them due to some combination of privacy concerns and plain absentmindedness. Also, while they lacked the charming boxiness of floppy diskettes or the iridescent surfaces of CDs, flash drives had a panache that emailing one's self a link did not, especially his favorite, enclosed in a novelty case designed after a switchblade.
After stuffing some jerky and protein bars into his pockets in case the snacks at the event weren't sufficient, Arlo texted Spark and ran out to meet him at the parking garage, and the duo headed in the direction of Team Mystic HQ. Over the 45-minute drive, Arlo had specifically produced a playlist designed to provide a representative sample of the different eras of Escape the Fate's output, which happened to correspond in turn to the songs he'd chosen to put snippets of into his presentation. The choice of which songs to include took up roughly half of the time in preparing the slides. While neither of them could substantially hear the lyrics Arlo decried over his descriptions of the mathematically proven decline in quality after the change in lead singers and songwriters, both enjoyed it nonetheless. Regardless of Spark's subcultural credentials or personal familiarity with the content, the fact that he was not only legitimately interested not only in what Arlo had to say, but understood it as a deep expression of love and Arlo's best attempt to bring Spark into his mental world, a merger of souls if one wanted to be poetic, added a sense of profound meaning and connection to the experience. Plus it was fun to talk shit on Craig, especially if backed by science.
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